Shopping for clothes has never been a fun thing I enjoyed doing. I would only buy clothes when I needed them, or after gaining a bunch of weight when I “grew” out of them. Ironically, when I lost weight, I generally didn’t buy new clothes. I just wore the same clothes only baggier. Whenever my friends or my sister wanted to go shopping, I would humor them and tag along, but had no expectation of finding anything I liked or anything in my size. I would walk up to a rack and pretend I was looking for myself, then give up and look for things for them. I was just there. Not really participating, not really having fun, just there in my thoughts, talking to myself about how big I was, how ugly I was and how I wished I had a cuter, skinnier body. Continue reading “Hiding in Plain Sight”
Something I’ve been thinking about lately is my magic number. You know the one – the number I want to pop up when I’m standing on the scale. I used to think that when I achieved the magic number, my life would start. I would get the boyfriend. Or the perfect job. Or travel. I used to think my life would be better if I weighed my magic number. Continue reading “The Magic Number”
Last Christmas, I was invited to stay with some friends from Germany for the holidays. Every morning we would wake up and fix breakfast. We would set the table, prepare the food, and sit down to enjoy eating together. The host, as she prepared our meals, made a point to create beautiful plates. She would put slices of meat fanned out on one half of the plate while complimenting the other half with cheeses. She set out yogurt and fruit and everything was beautifully staged for our eating pleasure. As I watched her create these culinary artistic visions, I realized it didn’t take any extra time to make a pretty plate. What a pleasure to have these edible works of art sitting in front of me as I began to nourish my body with the food my friend had prepared. Continue reading “Making a Pretty Plate”
For the past 7 years, I have been attending weekend seminars on communication, listening and relating, hosted by Ariel and Shya Kane. I found the Kanes when I was searching for reasons why my life wasn’t the way I wanted it. Ariel and Shya wrote a book called, Working on Yourself Doesn’t Work, The 3 Principles of Instantaneous Transformation. It resonated with me. One of the ideas they present is about “true listening” – setting aside my opinions, agendas and prejudices and truly listening from another person’s perspective as if the words are brand new. What a difference it has made in my life. New possibilities continue to become available to me when I truly listen. I’ve also discovered that listening isn’t just about hearing people talk. It is possible to listen to my body as well. Continue reading “The body can talk to you… are you listening?”
Back in my early 20’s, I bought a beautiful royal blue, sequined, form-fitting dress from Dillard’s. I loved it and knew I would love wearing it. I could imagine feeling sexy in it, but at the time, I didn’t have the slim body shape needed to wear it. But I bought it anyway and used it as a goal to lose weight – “someday, I’ll be skinny enough to wear it.” And there it hung in my closet. For years. Continue reading “Size Matters”
One Saturday morning, I was out running errands when I looked down at the gas gauge in my car. Realizing I was close to empty, I pulled over to the local gas station convenience store (QuikTrip). Usually, I would run into the store and buy a soda or some snacks to eat, but this time I was just content with putting gas in my car. As the gas was pumping, I began reminiscing about the previous weekend when I had attended a communications and listening seminar in New York City and was thinking about the friends I had stayed with. Continue reading “Temptation Everywhere (that doesn’t have to be tempting!)”
On a crisp April afternoon, I decided to take my dog Homer for a walk in our neighborhood park across the street. The park has a large lake, framed with hundred year old trees and a walking path that is .42 miles long. From my front door, one lap around the lake and back to my front door, I figure it’s about a 1/2 mile.
So on this particular day, Homer and I were enjoying our walk when out of the corner of my eye I saw a bird flying across the lake. Continue reading “Looking Through the Eyes of a Child”